A paraphrase or rephrase is where you re-write a text using different words without losing the meaning of the original text itself. It's an experimental technique poets can use to infuse a deeper level of creativity into their previously written words. It's a rich form of reiteration. In jazz music, especially the more experimental forms, you may never hear the same phrase played twice. This is because the musicians understand that within the tempo and root chords, just about anything is possible. It's the same with poetry, except there are even less constraints than in jazz! That should tell you just how free and creative you can be in your writing.
Method 19: Try this: Go back to one of your previously written poems and examine it. Are there words or phrases you could improve upon? Are there lines that could benefit from a make-over? Let me give you some examples of poetry that would not have been as impressive if it hadn't been developed by the writer...
There is a classic poem called Mandalay, by English poet Rudyard Kipling. It's a fabulous, entertaining poem containing many inventive lines... one that stands out for me is '...an' the dawn comes up like thunder....' He could easily have written '...and the sun rises in a spectacular way...' but it would not have been as effective.
Another more recent classic by Welsh poet Dylan Thomas has the first line 'Do not go gentle into that good night...' Again, it would be simpler to say 'Do not fade slowly in death...' but this wouldn't have been as poetic.
Are there words or phrases in your old poems that could do with a make-over? I know there are in many of mine!
Steve Wheeler
Previous posts in this series
Experimental Poetry 1: Found Poetry
Experimental Poetry 2: Stream of Consciousness
Experimental Poetry 3: Fake Translations
Experimental Poetry 4: Overlapping Voices
Experimental Poetry 5: Random Prompts
Experimental Poetry 6: The Movie Method
Experimental Poetry 7: Unexpected End Rhymes
Experimental Poetry 8: Calligrams
Experimental Poetry 9: Anarchic Poetry
Experimental Poetry 10: Timed Writing
Image from pxhere used under a Creative Commons licence
I love this suggestion of rephrasing some of my poems. Your examples are great. Thanks, Steve!
ReplyDeleteThis goes back a long way so I can't remember the sequence of thoughts. In a poem that was a set of snapshots of a visit to Washington DC. In describing the grid system of the roads, the original might have been:
ReplyDeleteGeometric city. Anonymous streets
Labelled with letters and numbers
Divide the shops into blocks.
I then probably decided to change it into "Chop the shops into blocks" going for the internal rhyme.
But the idea of chopping led me to think, what is straight and chops. A memory surfaced of the marble-topped counters in a grocer's shop when I was a child, and being fascinated by seeing the cheese cut so neatly with a cheese-wire. Hence the final version:
Geometric city. Anonymous streets
Labelled with letters and numbers
Cheese-wire the shops into blocks.
STEVE'S Exercise 11 - Paraphrasing
ReplyDeleteI grabbed any poem. It turned out to be LET LOVE (April 17, 2023 7:36pm)
Although I am not used to this particular style because it attempts to 'drag on' sentences (to my way of thinking) I did come up with this:
Revised Jun27/24/8:50am
LET LOVE
by Fatamira
Let Love blossom by Full Moon in hypnotic gaze,
Moonbeams streaming finely lit chains of golden rays;
Grant Mozart a Maestro's baton leading between waltzing leaves,
Falling from Heaven’s Magnolia trees
~
Let laughing children play tag by charms delight,
Entertaining heartfelt giggles in warm sunlight;
And, when Moon and Sun have appointed curtain's run,
Allow ecstatic-pinned Stars to come undone
~
The Crow may have something to say,
Reiterating caws and be on his way;
Chickadee and her gleeful desire to please,
Will tease sweet notes into summer's sultry breeze
~
But, lost is Love without a heartbeat,
Walking Eden’s Garden in mature springtime covet;
For, without fingers intertwined and kiss in spare,
Vacant is a hollowed out Love to share
~
Profound preponderance postpones the task,
Upon solemn-weighted scales of ask;
Memory’s Polaris buoys the day,
For, having met you your Meraki Soul had stayed.
©️ 2023 Karin J. Hobson
Universal Peace & Love 🪷
Now this is one exercise I can sink my teeth into… rewriting favorite poems and revising our own. Genius lesson… every poet should give this a whirl!
ReplyDelete